Wedding!

    Last week, one of my neighbors got married. It was the daughter of the family that Kristy has been living with, a 24 year woman named Nanginyi. She was supposed to be married this past February but because they didn't get the planning done on time and they can't have the wedding during Lent (because it is a period of mourning and they can't be excessively happy or have celebrations then), they had to move the wedding back.

    The ceremonies began on Thursday night. The whole wedding party and all of the family members dressed up in elaborate clothing and paraded around town around 5pm. The procession was led by a pick up truck filled with band members playing brass instruments, then followed by a line of cars filled with the whole party. Everyone was dancing and singing and all of the cars were decorated with flowers, ribbons, and crepe paper. I watched the last bit of it when they were going through Darajambili until they got to their house. Then it was time for the Send off Party.

    The Send off party is where (officially) the bride's family says good bye to their daughter and gives her to the groom's family. Traditionally, the bride would move in with the groom's family and would probably never see her own family ever again. This isn't exactly followed anymore, at least by those who live in cities and are close to things like public transportation – but they still have the ceremony.

    Mama got dressed up and left with the wedding party to go to the hall early to help set up- she is a really good family friend. At about 6:30, Veronica and I got dressed and got a taxi there. The party was held at Green Acres Banquet Hall, a building on the grounds of a really excellent private school for Tanzanians, Green Acres (coincidentally where Ipti goes to school). The hall was decorated quite elaborately and was filled with people. Everyone was mingling around outside and hanging out and admiring the gifts the Nanginyi's parents had bought for her. The bride's parents are supposed to handle the Send Off party, while the groom's parents are supposed to pay for the wedding. Nanginyi's parents also bought her gifts for her Send Off, two sofas, a chair, three coffee tables, a china cabinet, and a stove. It was insane, the amount of gifts that Nanginyi and Eliasi received for their wedding. They had the gifts sitting outside the entrance under a tarp so that everyone could admire them as they walked inside.

    As we walked inside we were offered appetizers, bowls of beef broth and kebabs with beef deep fried in egg on them – they didn't look super appetizing, so I passed on them. Veronica and I found where Mama was sitting (she had saved seats for us) and went to sit down. A little after 7, the ceremony began. There were many different parts and the whole thing last about four hours before we ate dinner. First, the bride paraded around the room with the wedding party and everyone was introduced. Then there were a lot of speakers from the bride's family, minister, and friends. Then the bride had to go "find" her groom who was hiding somewhere in the audience. Then he was introduced and there were more speakers. Nanginyi and Eliasi then thanked her parents, grandparents, and friends for raising her and giving her away. First there was "English" cake, normal white cake which they fed to their grandparents and to each other and their friends, and they gave away a whole one to her parents and to his parents. Then there was "traditional" cake, a roasted goat (a female one because they were celebrating the woman), which they fed pieces of to each other and various people. The goat was paraded around and sung about as it was wheeled in by the chefs. (there are pictures of all of this on Picasa).

    After the "cakes" was the gift giving. This is a very elaborate dancing line of party who line up with their gifts and dance forward as music plays to present their gift to the bride and groom. This was repeated many times, for various categories of people and gifts. Afterwards, gifts were then given to Nanginyi's parents as thanks for raising her. The whole experience lasted about an hour. I helped my family present their gifts, it was strange to stand in line and dance up to the front, but quite entertaining (there are videos of this on Picasa).

    Finally, after the gift giving, it was time for dinner. By this time it was ten thirty. Dinner was a buffet of typical African foods. There were a lot of people and we were sitting close to the back, so we ended up eating around 11:15. Dinner was good though, and it was fun to see what kinds of food they would pick for the wedding (they had chicken, fish, goat, and beef as well as beans and bananas, rice, pilipili, fruit, cabbage, and many other things). After the dinner, there was another hour of speech giving and prayers and a leaving ceremony where the bride is presented to the groom's family, then it was over.

    Afterwards we hung around for a little bit and took pictures – I got home a little after 12:30 AM.

The wedding itself was on Saturday. Around 2 ish my mama and I headed over to Nanginyi's house. Everyone was getting dressed and ready for the wedding. It was very exciting. I ate some Nyama Ndizi that their house girl, Fatuma, brought me, while a bunch of other women from the village (with a few men in tow) arrived. About thirty minutes later, it was time to go. The family had paid for a dalla dalla to take their close friends to and from the wedding. We piled into the dalla dalla and headed off to the Lutheran Church in downtown Arusha.

    Turns out that in Tanzania, churches will marry multiple brides, at the same time, to save money. So at this wedding there were SIX brides. To make things more interesting, FOUR of the six were pregnant. Huh. Anyway, so there was a band playing when we got to the church and people were just starting to walk inside and sit down. Mama and found seats near the front and sat down. A few minutes later the band walked in, followed by the six brides, the six grooms, and the six bridal parties (best men, bridesmaids, flower girls, the whole shebang). After everyone had sat down, the minister came in. He said a prayer, introduced everyone, then began his sermon. It was about an hour (ish) long, but since it was in Swahili I'm not quite sure what it was about. He was a good speaker though, everyone got really excited and was clapping and laughing throughout it. After the sermon, there was the usual wedding vows, etc. Except that this all had to be repeated six times. Then there was signing the wedding certificate six times before all of the newly married couples left the church together at the end.

    There was a flurry of picture taking afterwards. For little more than an hour we moved to various locations around Arusha to take pictures of the bride and groom and everyone. Then it was time for the wedding reception.

    This was exactly like the Send Off party. As we walked in there were appetizers, chicken broth soup with garlic croutons and once again we received inscribed handkerchiefs. The reception after the wedding is where the groom's family officially accepts the bride into their family. So instead of the focus being on the bride like at the Send Off, the focus was on the groom and his family. There was once again speeches, cake feeding (both English and traditional cake – the goat was a male this time), gift giving (although less because these were gifts from the groom's side of the family and they're not supposed to give as many gifts), and then a buffet dinner. The food was very similar to that which we had on Thursday. After dinner, the bridesmaids danced for awhile, then everyone got up and danced. We left relatively early though, I was home by 11pm.

 

It was a great time though – I totally loved it. Look at the pictures on Picasa!!